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And in related stories.   Water is wet.  Rattlesnakes are dangerous.  And
Canada sucks.

It's almost an insult to gays for him to even announce this now. He
went all those years with a "no comment" and now when no one cares
about him he decided to be brave.

On Mar 10, 10:10 pm, Alan Smithee <a...@last.inc> wrote:

Sean Hayes, What Took You So Long?

Read More: Coming Out , Ellen Degeneres , Rosie O'Donnell , Roy
Ashburn , Sean Hayes , The Advocate , Wanda Sykes , Entertainment
News

Rosie O'Donnell and Wanda Sykes were comparing coming-out stories the
other day on O'Donnell's satellite radio show when O'Donnell, who came
out in 2002, announced that it was another lesbian--a former editor of
The Advocate--who pushed the hardest to get her out of the closet.
"She'd be at every event I was at and she'd say, 'I really want to
talk with you about coming out. When are you going to come out?' It
felt like pressure from the gay community, not really anyone else."

Sean Hayes, who played the flamboyantly gay Jack on the outrageously
successful sitcom Will & Grace, felt similar pressure from yet another
former editor of The Advocate. In 2006, after many turned-down
requests to interview Hayes, the magazine ran a story titled "Sean
Hayes: The Interview He Never Gave." The one-page "Q&A" was a clip job
of quotes Hayes had given to other publications through the years that
made him look silly for pretending no one knew he was gay.

Four years later, Hayes has finally acknowledged that he's gay--on the
cover of the current issue of The Advocate. And in doing so, he's
expressed a lot of resentment toward folks who prodded him to do so
sooner.

"I feel like I've contributed monumentally to the success of the gay
movement in America," he tells the magazine. "What more do you want me
to do? Do you want me to stand on a float? And then what? It's never
enough."

I'm not sure a float would have made that much of a difference. But
O'Donnell's and Hayes's openness shouts louder than all the pride
parades in the world--especially for young people, who (no discredit
to the terrific examples of Ellen DeGeneres and Neil Patrick Harris)
are desperate for more openly gay and lesbian role models.

Still, I wonder if we're misdirecting our efforts--constantly goading
celebrities who are already allies but not yet ready to announce their
sexual orientation--when people like Roy Ashburn are passing by with
little to no attention.

Haven't heard of Ashburn? He's a California state senator who, after
opposing marriage equality and fighting a statewide holiday
recognizing slain gay rights pioneer Harvey Milk, was arrested last
week on drunk driving charges after leaving a Sacramento gay bar. Only
then did Ashburn acknowledge that he is gay, saying, "I've always
believed that I could keep my personal life personal and my public
life public. But through my own actions, I have made my personal life
public."

I've got no beef with people who want to keep their personal lives
private. But the difference between someone like Hayes, whose public
life actually opened people's eyes to the realities of gay people
(albeit on a sometimes stereotypical and always comedic level), and
Ashburn, whose public life was built on deception and the denial of
equal rights, is profound.

As I read the thousands of tweets and comments on Advocate.com in
response to Sean Hayes's decision to come out--many of them catty
"What took you so long?" remarks--I wonder how many of these people
are also calling Ashburn's Bakersfield office to demand his
resignation. How many of them have seen Kirby Dick's amazing
documentary Outrage and taken action to help unseat the closeted
politicians featured in the film?

My predecessors at The Advocate weren't driven solely by the bottom
line in their unending push to get O'Donnell and Hayes out of the
closet--coming out really is a noble and wonderful thing. But as a
journalist I know--as they did--that many more people will be drawn to
stories about celebrity than they will be to stories about people like
Roy Ashburn.

Still, as a gay man who is unequal in the eyes of the law, I can't
help but think we'd do ourselves a favor if we embrace people, like
Hayes, who willingly (and on their own timetable) come out of the
closet and save our anger for rooting out--and kicking out--the
hypocrites who are determined to keep us down.

====

God, Ellen's "puppy" called... it wants its ERA back! About 12+ years
too late, Shawny.